Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Curtain rods...

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    530

    Default Curtain rods...

    He spent the first day packing his belongings into boxes, crates and
    suitcases.

    On the second day, he had the movers come and collect his things.

    On the third day, he sat down for the last time at their beautiful dining
    room table, put on some soft background music, and feasted on a pound of
    shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of spring-water.

    When he had finished, he went into each and every room and deposited a few
    half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of the curtain
    rods.

    He then cleaned up the kitchen and left. When the wife returned with her
    new boyfriend, all was bliss for the first few days.

    Then slowly, the house began to smell.

    They tried everything; cleaning, mopping and airing the place out.

    Vents were checked for dead rodents and carpets were steam cleaned.

    Air fresheners were hung everywhere.. Exterminators were brought in to set
    off gas canisters, during which they had to move out for a few days and in
    the end they even paid to replace the expensive wool carpeting.
    Nothing worked!!!

    People stopped coming over to visit.
    Repairmen refused to work in the house.
    The maid quit..

    Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move
    out.
    A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could
    not find a buyer for their stinky house.

    Word got out and eventually even the local realtors refused to return
    their calls.

    Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to purchase
    a new place.

    Then the ex-husband called the wife and asked how things were going.

    She told him the saga of the rotting house. He listened politely and said
    that he missed his old home terribly and would be willing to increase her
    divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house.

    Knowing her ex-husband had no idea how bad the smell was, she agreed on a
    price that was still about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but
    only if he were to sign the papers that very day.

    He agreed and within the hour her lawyers delivered the paperwork.

    A week later the woman and her boyfriend stood smiling as they watched the
    moving company pack everything to take to their new home.........

    And to spite the ex-husband, they even took the curtain rods.......

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Novi, MI
    Posts
    912

    Default

    Ahahahahahahahahahahahaha...

    That is awesome!!!

    Ahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!
    Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy Sh*t... WHAT A RIDE!"


  3. #3
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    530

    Default

    Eh, it's an old one.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Novi, MI
    Posts
    912

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by B-Kinger View Post
    Eh, it's an old one.
    You want me to slap you... DON'T START THIS!!!

    Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting "Holy Sh*t... WHAT A RIDE!"


  5. #5
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Posts
    530

    Default

    Ha ha ha ha ha!!!! But THIS one IS an old one!
    Last edited by B-Kinger; 05-09-2009 at 11:48 AM.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •