View Full Version : Why do we procreate?

08-24-2013, 11:05 AM
So I have a son who's soon to be 21, he's a good kid but just made a life altering mistake. Last Tuesday night he attended the Kid Rock show in town and got a DUI on the way home, enter huge bomb in my household. It gets worse, turns out he could not of been in a worse county for this infraction, lawyer tells me he's going to get taxed big time, more, the judge has a hard on for these type of offenses and shows no mercy.
Now before some of you critique my parenting skills let me say I do what I can. I've told him more times then I can count " wrap up that thing and don't drink and drive" "call me if you need a ride, call me with whatever problem you have" I might be mad but I'll always have your back.
I may even have to sell my bike to pay for his legals and fines and compound that with the fact that I just started a new job and will have to take time off to stand by his side through the court process. There is a real chance he will have to spend some time in jail which has me very concerned. This is not like when I was younger and would get my beer poured out and at worse driven home to your parents.
This post is more about venting and maybe hearing some relating experiances.

08-24-2013, 11:26 AM
Soon to be 21, let him stand on his own. My dad had friends in the legal system, he always helped my brother. He's now 50 and still getting in trouble. Oakland county will be hard on him , drug and alcohol testing, counseling, 2 years probation and maybe still some jail time. If he got charged with a super drunk, which would be double the .08 , the courts will not plea, unless your lawyer is a bad ass.

08-24-2013, 01:48 PM
Wow...really? Not gonna happen brother, I would sell my house if I had to to get this kid the best mouthpiece I can find, which I've done. This will be in Oakland Co with judge Diagastini, he will learn a lesson for sure, he will pay me back but in the meantime I want him to have the best chance possible.

08-24-2013, 02:27 PM
I feel for you as I have 3 teens here at home and not looking forward to the whole dating and partying thing. We all did it when we were younger and most of us got through fine, but times have unfortunately changed. Good luck to you and your family in dealing with this.

08-24-2013, 04:27 PM
Sorry to hear that Bill. No experience to share.

08-24-2013, 07:53 PM
sorry to hear. Kids make dumb mistakes, thats the cost of growin up. I nearly got a DUI about a year ago, I lucked out due to the fact the cop was an Air Force vet. He saw my veterans plate and asked me, "You got some one you can call and drive you home?" Yessir, was my reply and he told me to park it. I really lucked out. My Dad never even judged me, he just said, "you got lucky on that one. Call me next time." No worries on that one I haven't even been close to drunk outside the house since then.
Hope you the best of luck with your troubles to come.

08-25-2013, 12:06 AM
Bill thats all you can do stand by him the best you can.I went thru something like that with my boy.we did the best we could till it was allover made sure he paid us back(lesson learning)and it hasnt happened since.good luck brother."this too will pass"

Gas Man
08-25-2013, 12:34 PM
I know "somebody" close to me that got a DUI (no not me or the wife, we'll just leave it at that).

In wayne county, but he saw the local district court judge, in this case Romulus. He was a mile from his house, driving when he shouldn't have been, and rolled a stop sign. Fuckin stupid. Rule 1, don't do it. Rule 2, drive like a fuckin saint.

Anyway, got the book thrown at him for his first offense.

He did like 1 year of testing. Gets assigned a color group, say purple, purple calls in between this time and this time. Listen to the recording, and see if you have to come in and piss test for booze. If you had one drink in the last 3 days, you're F'ed, you'll piss dirty. They can only test you twice a week.

He got a Probation Officer for this, and had to meet once a week. That lasted for about 6 months.

He had to do a alhohol counsoling till he tested out of that, and that was about 3 months or so.

Plus 40 hours of community service, which I believe your PO helps you get setup for.

I think that was it, beyond all the fines and now the drivers responsibilities fees on his license for Lansing.

I would think your son's steps will be similar. If you want to hear more, I'm sure I can get you in touch with this guy I know.

08-25-2013, 02:00 PM
$15,000 - $18,000 is about average.

Gas Man
08-25-2013, 06:17 PM
Oh my guy didn't have anything like that. A couple grand was about it. Where did you come up with that number?

08-25-2013, 07:47 PM
Last I heard it was around $5-$6k for court fees and penalties. Then you have to figure in your insurance rate hikes.

08-25-2013, 08:51 PM
Oakland county will force you in to counseling , 55 bucks a session is inexpensive estimate. Once a week for 2 years. They will also require testing for the probation period. That could be 25 bucks a shot 2 - 3 times a week. Some of Tue younger people are made to test for k2 50 bucks a test. I manage a facility that does the testing , we do 22-25 k a month in sales.

08-26-2013, 01:06 AM
Sorry to hear that Bill. That really sucks. If you need a good lawyer give me a call. I got a no bs lawyer who can work some magic.

09-03-2013, 01:47 AM
Id give Mudpuppy's attorney a call. I dont see him getting anything but a bunch of fines and some classes. All the courts want is money. He wont see jail time unless he is a repeat offender.

09-03-2013, 07:44 PM
Im not trying to one up anybody, but I feel your pain. I have a 26 year old daughter that is a heroin addict. Ive just finished my 3rd divorce and somehow I still think its my fault

Gas Man
09-03-2013, 08:12 PM
WOW Al... I don't even have anything funny to say to that... sorry to hear all of that.

09-04-2013, 10:10 AM
somehow I still think its my fault

Well it's not bro, adults make poor choices. Hang in there.

09-04-2013, 11:06 AM
Im not trying to one up anybody, but I feel your pain. I have a 26 year old daughter that is a heroin addict. Ive just finished my 3rd divorce and somehow I still think its my fault

Damn Al!!!! I can't even imagine.... Wow.... Sorry to hear. I have a buddy with a kid like that, I can see how it tears him up every time he gets a call from him...

Ultra AL
09-04-2013, 11:33 AM
Until he's ready to make the change in his life, no matter what you do or say, it's up to him. You can plant the seeds, but he's gotta want it. It isn't your fault man. He's made his choices. Hopefully, he can come to his sense soon.